FACEBLOCK- The antisocial network

Welcome to India’s first antisocial network. Now, get in touch with your friends on FACEBLOCK. You can share, upload & like the itty bitty dirty shitty statements and stories posted by your friends and enemies.

Here are some sample statements n posts. Whatever!!

-Got my first periods. Feeling Red!

-Celebrating 1^st night with my hubby in a hotel suite. Feeling orgasmic!

-Hi friends n relatives, thank you for liking my first strapless Enamor bra 32D.

-Aww!! Your puppy’s poop is so sweet!! Kissi

-Today’s rakshash Tadka’s 4000^th Janm-jayanti. Share with 10 people, receive 10 shocks!

-Shaved off my chest hair. Feeling feminine!

-Today is my toilet’s 1^st anniversary. Feeling poopy!

-Keep Calm Love My Shit

-Waiting in a queue outside the loo. Feeling sarkari!

-Enjoying a warm bath at Lane 4, Juhu.

-Committing suicide on Nalasopara rail track. Feeling yamraj!

-My grandma passed away. Feeling awesome!

-Enjoying pajama party at a friend’s place. Feeling undressed!

-My underarms sweating at 30 ̊ C. Feeling hot!

-My first ganji-jhangia gifted by my girlfriend. Feeling Rupa!

-Celebrating my kid’s 100^th punishment in the principal’s cabin. Proud of you beta.

-My dog was embarrassed in front of a bitch. She was fucking another dog.

-Enjoying a divorce dinner with family. Thank you for the hitch n the ditch. Mwaah!

-Oh it’s purple. It would not have been possible without your sperms. Thank you my husband.

Wearing braces at a dentist. Feeling hahahah!!!

Shit if you like 

Bad-duaon ka ghanta

Bad-duaon ka ghanta

Aankhon mein khoon, haathon mein apna haq aur muh mein kaali zubaan liye, public mein,

main baja rahi hoon bad-duaon ka ghanta.

Ghanta # 1: Chhote chhote bachchon ka sex trade karnewale, unki masoomiyat ko nanga karnewale, unki cheekhon ka dum ghotnewale besharm-benchod-bhadwe… teri izzat teri body tere har ek ang mein hazaron keelein bhonki jaaye, teri dard ke maare nikli har ek cheekh par jashn manaya jaaye.

Ghanta # 2: Hari Om…Hari Om…Bapu khudki har mano-kaam-na puri kare! Ramkatha sunanewale- Shivlingam pe doodh chadhanewale-kesri lungi ke andar kaand karnewale-religious circus ke bapu… tere pujya lingam pe petrol chadhkar uska havan kiya jaaye. Aur phir bapu ke bhakto ko havan ka prashad dekar realize karvaya jaaye…ke bhai aur behen bahot katva li apni. Ab toh sudhro.

Ghanta # 3: Mere desh ki, foreign ki, ladkiyan dekhkar unhe akela paakar rape karnewale, unhein coma mein pahuchanewale society ke 10 -12 bhadwe-politician ke bete-sissy policemen-tumhe kum se kum sazaa dekar chhod denewale sarkari suvar aur panchayati randibaaz… tum sabko kisi stadium ke beech ulta latka kar, tumhari aankho mein 2-2 boond acid daala jaaye. Tumhare out-of-control part ke ek ek tissue ko surgical equipments se kaata jaaye.

Ghanta # 4: Behla phuslake, chocolate, ice cream aur lollipop khilane ke bahane bachchon ka sexual abuse karnewale chootiye chacha-gandu padosi-good morning teacher-saale hijre-tantrik baba-ghar ke khaas naukar… tere andar garm loha ghusaya jaaye. Jis tarha tuney abuse kiya usse badtar tarike se tujhe abuse kiya jaaye. Na tu jeene ke qabil rahe aur nah tujhe maut dekar baksha jaaye.

Ghanta # 5: Apne employees ko salary na denewale, unki roz-baroz ki zindagi tabah karne wale, unko aakhri saans tak tadpane wale beimaan tharki employer… tere ghar mein aaj, kal aur aanewali generations tak sirf ghor andher ho.

Ghanta # 6: Gareebon ke ghar, kisaano ke khet, unki zameen, unki mehnat ki fasl par apna bal chalanewale lootere zameendar-harami mantri-panchayati kutte, tere upar koi muqaddama na kiya jaaye; tujhe gaon-sheher ke beechobeech hockey sticks se peeta jaaye. Tere upar hal chalaya jaaye. Tujhe adhmara sa sukhe kuein mein fenk diya jaaye.

Ghanta # 7: Sundarta ke dushman-abhimani lund- vikrut jhalle-dharm-o-mazhab ke chaatoo, chehron par acid fenknewale, tujhe tere ghar aakar, tere chochle balls ko petrol se aadha jalakar chhod diya jaaye. Teri tasveerein internet pe circulate ki jaaye. Tere dard pe khilkhilakar hansa jaaye.

Ghanta # 8: Road accidents karke khoon ki bauccharein udaakar bhaag jaanewale drunk-doped civilian driver, Tu toh khud zeher kha-pi raha hai. Chal, toh tere liver ko kaat kar usme powder bharte hain, phir usse wapas seal kar dete hain. Teri body ko kahin kahin se kaat kar woh hissa khula chhod dete hain.

Agar iss explicit content se kisi ko bura lage, koi hurt ho toh main haath jodkar maafi…

nahin mangungi. Kyun ke reality yahi hai ke humare kiye gaye candle-march, strikes, streetplays aur parliament ke bahar protests ka zara sa bhi asar nahin hua hai. Samajh nahin aa raha problem kahan par hai? Law system mein, police ki so-called authority mein, politicians ke power mein, sarkar ki satta mein ya hamari soch mein… samajh nahin aa raha. Ghum phirkar sab wahin ka wahin aa jaata hai aur jo chal raha hai, chalta hi jaata hai. Safety apps like Vith U, Scream Alarm, I am safe, SOS and many more to come…do we really feel safe by having these apps in our mobile phones? It’s a very good and helpful initiative; there is no doubt about it but jab tak koi aapka apna aapke paas pahuchta hai tab tak shayad bahot der ho jaati hai. Women ke liye lightweight revolver launch ki jaa rahi hai jiske liye obviously license chahiye. Aur usko self-defense ke liye agar fire kiya, tab bhi sab chhod chhadkar court ke chakkar kaato aur prove karo ke hamare saath kuch bahot hi khatarnak honewala tha and they will say… par hua toh nahin na! Probably we need to find these inhuman creatures and kill them publicly just like they killed Qaddafi in Libya.

All I want to say to my family, friends, parents, children and dear citizens let’s not take our safety for granted. Let’s be alert.